How to Start a Conversation With a Girl 101

Remember when Ross Geller made a conversation with the cute delivery girl about gas? It’s pretty easy to lose all reasonable thoughts when you feel attracted to someone. Even if you’re not attracted, sometimes, the sheer idea of talking to a girl will make you nervous.
Well, feeling nervous about talking to girls is pretty normal. What’s not normal is making a conversation about gas. If you don’t want to be the Ross Geller of your group, take a look here at how to start a conversation with a girl.

Make Eye Contact

When you’re walking toward the girl to make a conversation with her, try to make eye contact to let her know you’re interested. This way, she knows you’re approaching to talk to her, and she knows the conversation is intentional. It’s much better than appearing out of nowhere and constantly looking at the walls instead of her eyes.
Making eye contact will also help you determine whether she’s open to a conversation. If she looks the other way after noticing your eye contact, she may not be interested.
After you approach her, make sure you keep your body in a comfortable position. Try not to get too close, especially if you’re standing near a corner or a wall.

Mention Mutual Interests

Talking about mutual interests instantly establishes a connection between you two. For example, if you’re at a party, you may start talking about the music or the host. You can spark up a conversation by asking her if she knows the host, then take it from there.
Try to look casual and smile in a friendly manner. If she feels you’re uptight or nervous, she may lose interest faster than you can blink.

Ask About Her Interests

All people love it when you talk to them about something they like. If you want to have a conversation with a girl, it’d be a good idea to ask her about her favorite artist or TV show. If you’re at a party, you can approach and ask her if she likes the song that’s on.
Or, if you know she loves a particular TV show, you can approach her about it and ask about her opinion about the finale. You can also have a conversation about food.
In these cases, talking about such things is better than asking her personal questions. And, make sure to listen to everything she says. You’ll need it later on to start another conversation; girls love it when they feel you’re interested in what they’re saying.

Ask About Her Day

If you’re already familiar with the girl you want to talk to, but she isn’t a friend, you can start a conversation by asking about her day. For example, if you see her regularly in a class or even in your local cafe, you can ask her how her day went. You can continue the conversation by asking about her plans and what she usually does on her days.
When you do this, the girl will know that you genuinely want to know her. Plus, you’ll know if she’s interested or happy that you’re talking to her. Girls make themselves obvious when they don’t like someone.

Talk About an Event Coming Up

The easiest way to start a conversation with a girl is by talking about an event coming up. Of course, this will only work if there’s an actual event coming up.
You can ask her if she’s going to the party next weekend, or ask about her plans for the Christmas break.
This is an easy way to start a conversation because the girl will be able to give a response and keep talking. Plus, it’ll lay the road out for you to talk to her once again in the event. If you’re both going to the party, you can wait for it to talk some more.
If there’s no party or special holiday coming close, you can talk about a test or a class you’re waiting for.

Ask for Her Recommendations

All girls love it when you ask them about something. If you ask a girl about her recommendation for something, she’ll feel happy that you chose her out of everyone to ask her and that you value her opinion. And girls love feeling special.
You can ask her about movie suggestions or recommendations for a new place to eat at. When you get closer, you can ask her about her opinion of a watch or a pair of shoes you want to buy.
If you ask her about a place to eat at, you can invite her to come along if she seems excited.

Mention a Mutual Friend

If you know you both have a mutual friend, you can mention their name to establish some trust. Otherwise, she may get nervous if you’re a random guy coming up to talk to her. You can mention that you came across her Facebook profile and found X as a mutual friend. Then, you can ask her how she knows X and take the conversation from there.

Take the Hint

When you’re starting a conversation with a girl, be mindful of the signs she’s sending. If she’s constantly making eye contact and smiling, and she looks like she doesn’t want the conversation to end, she’s probably interested.
On the other hand, if she’s giving short answers and checking her phone every five seconds, this is your cue to end the conversation.
Try to gauge what she’s feeling from her body language so you don’t continue the conversation unnecessarily. If you think she’s uninterested, don’t take it personally. In the end, it’s a 50/50 chance.


Most guys are nervous about starting a conversation with a girl they’re not familiar with. It’s totally understandable, especially if you tried to do it with another girl and got disappointed. However, don’t let it discourage you.
When you start a conversation about food, TV shows, or mutual friends, it’ll go naturally. Even if the girl is uninterested, you’ll carry on with the conversation and go your own way. So, there’s nothing to lose here.